McDonald's

December 30. Two days before the year turns, a thing I never thought would happen again happened. 

We talked for almost an hour (no, it's just actually me who did most of the talking. haha). 

But yeah, everything's a lot different now- a huge space is now separating us, I am eating food on my own, we frequently look at our mobile phones, texting once in a while and we don't have stories to laugh our hearts with. 

Gladly, there are things that still remain the same, like when he said he feels cold and when he asked  if I feel the same, I said "no", then he said: "cause you're fat!" and we both smiled at it. And when I asked him about his family, their annual reunion that I've attended a Christmas ago, he answered me as if I am still part of that family.

Then he asked me if I am still mad at him, I didn't know what to answer but I knew deep in my heart that remembering everything that he did to me still brings a tinge of pain in me, the memories are just too great to be easily forgotten, and the wound  is just too deep to be easily healed. And when we parted, he sent me a text message saying that he hopes for us to be really okay.

I really didn't thought it would happen again. That it's just the two of us, talking about how we're doing but this time as individual persons, as brother and sister under one organization, as the high school friends we once were, as the eagle scout talking to a rover scout under him.

So much has changed, and hopefully it's all for the better. :)

patay ka.

'nuff said. :)

sobrang cheesy talaga.

Oo. sobra.

Alam kong madaming magagalit sa pag-kirengkeng ko dito, pero di ko talaga mapigilan. Owmaygas.

Sa tatlong taon na pakikipagsapalaran namin ni MahalKO eh minsan pa lang niya ako binigyan ng bukey op plawers. (noong JS prom noong 4th year HS kami, 2 months pa lang kami nun!)

Ayos lang. Hindi naman kasi pa-girl ang lola mo at nasusuka ako sa tawagang "bhe", "bebeko", "bhie" at (bwaaaaak... ayan, sabi ko na nga ba eh).

Basta. Siguro kaya tumagal kami ng ganito eh sadyang masarap akong mahalin (aysus.pwede ba.), balik sa usapan, ayun, hindi kami clingy pareho. Hindi gaya nung ibang mag-jowa-ers na ka-edad namin na umiikot ang mundo sa isa't-isa. Pareho kasi kaming extrovert, mahilig sa crowd, in short gala. At nagiging impormal na ang blog ko, baka wala na ulit magbasa dito kaya tatapusin ko na ang kwento ko.

Ang gusto ko lang naman talagang ipagmayabang eh binigyan niya ako ng bukey op plawers noong August 14, 45th monthsary namin. Sa sobrang kilig ko, pakiramdam ko sing-haba ng red carpet sa kasalan ang buhok kong wavy noong hawak-hawak ko ang bukey op plawers sa eskwelahan.

Ngayon, ganap kong napatunayan na nga na isa akong tunay na babae kahit hindi ako pa-girl, eh kasi naman masarap talaga pakiramdam pag nabigyan ka ng bukey op plawers kahit santan pa o sampaguita 'yan, basta galing sa MahalKO, kyemerlash na kyemerlash sa lola mo.

O sige, tama na nga, baka mabasa pa 'to ni boyPILAY, lumaki bigla ang ulo niya. :)

eto hindi cheesy.

Kahapon, nag-emcee ako sa isang seminar.

Na-nega naman ako sa pagpalipit ng dila ko ng madaming beses, at gusto kong maghumiyaw na "pwede bang mag-essay na lang, kahit 2,000 words kakayanin ko!", pero syempre, pa-star nga ako kaya nama pinagsumikapan kong ayusin ang pag-e-emcee ko kaya nairaos din naman kahit sumabay 'yung tiyan ko na wala talagang pakisama sa akin.

Pagbalik ko sa boarding house nung gabi, nawawala ang two-years old na Havaianas ko.

Puteeek! Kaya naman walang puknat na pag-tuwad ang ginawa ko sa ilalim ng mga kama sa paghahanap ng tsinepen ko, pero nabigo ako, wala na siya. Naglakad kaya mag-isa?

Nakaka-nega. Dalawang taon na kami sa bahay na 'yun pero ngayon lang taon madaming nawawala. Noong una, 'yung alkansya nung kaibigan ko, ngayon naman yung Havs ko.

Na-depress ako ng 2 minutes kasi gutom na din ako noon, dinaan ko na lang sa pagkain ng Pancit Canton ang lahat, pero sadyang masaklap ang tadhana dahil tuwing sumasagi sa isip ko yung tsinepen ko ay di ko maiwasang malungkot.

Hindi dahil sa presyo nito, pero dahil sa sentimental value nito.

Ipinabili pa kasi namin ni MahalKO 'yun dati sa Trinoma sa pinsan ng bestfriend namin, sinadya pa namin mamili sa website ng Havaianas Philippines para magka-mukha kami.

Hay. I miss you, my old, yet comfortable tsinepen.

Bumalik ka na sa'kin, please?? :(

Havs sa Bolinao. :(

Oh really.

I was browsing through a copy of the Philippine Star dated May15, 2009. I picked up the Entertainment section seeing John Lloyd's picture and read the article below it about his rumored break-up with his non-showbiz girlfiriend. Of course, this is not a showbiz blog, so before you get bored, I'll start the real story.

After reading the article, I flipped the page and saw the comic strips. Above it was the Horoscope section. Curious to what was my weekend love forecast, I read it.

GEMINI: A relationship doesn't have to be committed for it to be deeply meaningful.

TAGOS.


(itutuloy. hindi na nakaya ng powers ng mga salita para ilarawan ang gustong isulat dito. )


RAK EN ROLL.

EMO. fita.

May karapatan naman siguro akong maging emo ng mga 2 seconds, pero noong mga nakaraang araw pakiwari ko na-high ako sa paghithit ng usok ng mga sasakyan at alimuom ng bagong aspaltong highway sa kahabaan ng Lungsod-Agham ng Muñoz kaya naman naging emo ako.

Siguro cyclical na talaga ang pagiging emo ko. Parang yung, alam mo 'yun-kasabay ng pagbabago sa hormones, nagiging mataas din ang emo-meter ko sa katawan at ang resulta nito ay ang pagka-bangag ko sa klase.

AYON SA PAGKAKAINTINDI KO:

PROF: Alam niyo yung value na sigurista mai-a-attribute sa contraceptives noh.
Sige, sino sa tingin niyo ang mas segurista, babae o lalaki?
AKO (PROUD NA PROUD): LALAKI PO.
PROF: Bakit?
AKO: Kasi po gumagamit sila ng (humina boses) condom.

TUMAWA SILANG LAHAT. HINDI KO NA-GETS.
GANITO PALA ANG TOTOONG PANGYAYARI:

PROF: Siguro maaari nating i-attribute yung "walang lamangan" system sa mga issue ng simbahan at pamahalaan tungkol sa paggamit ng contraceptives.
Sa "sigurista" system naman, sino sa tingin niyo ang mas sigurista sa ating mga Pilipino, mga lalaki ba o babae?

AKO: LALAKI PO!

PROF: Oh sige, ikaw, bakit?

AKO: Kasi po gumagamit sila ng (humina boses) condom.

Tapos na pala yung sa contraceptive na yun nung sumagot ako. Anak ng bayabas na hinog. Kaya pala sila nagtawanan lahat, grabe. Nakakahiya yung sagot ko. Wahaha. Kill me, kill me. NOW!

'Yan, yan ang di kanais-nais na epekto ng pagiging emo at pag-iisip na walang nagmamahal sa akin bukod sa mga bacteria sa loob ng mga kuko ko na pilit kong pinapahaba.

... if only sadness can be concealed by humor. :|

our pacquiao vs. dela hoya match.

No, this is not about them of course.

It's about Don and I having a boxing match today.

Since verifying the rumors yesterday that there will be no classes today, I was asking him if we could go to Cabanatuan and enjoy the rest of the day together, but he would not agree until this morning. I asked him why and he said that they will be having their basketball practice the whole day.

Oh yes, that fu*cking orange ball again.

I am not against him playing basketball of course, we already had an agreement that we are free to do ALL the things that we want to, for him it's basketball, for me, it's writing- seems unfair? yes.

I don't know why I agreed on that the least that I could remember is that when we made that agreement I was set to leave for Baguio for a seminar-workshop on Journalism. Argh. Now I realized, the Filipino saying that "nasa huli ang pagsisisi" is indeed true.

I am on a bad mood since yesterday because of cough and cold that I caught from late-night baratilyo shopping with Sir Francis, Kuya Jonnie, Kuya Fred, Alenna and him.

He sent me a message at 9 AM today that serves as my Good Morning greeting and I sent back a message sarcastically saying that "I thought you have a whole day practice today?" And there it was, the match began.

We argued about basketball for the nth time of our lives and I was like Dela Hoya during the Dream Match when he stood up and congratulated Pacquiao at the opening of the 9th round.

I gave up.

I cannot win over the f*cking basketball- and he warned me about it ages ago.

But he promised me that "basketball" will only be for the first semester since the University Intramurals takes place during the first sem. He also promised that he'll make-up for the times that he cannot have dinner with me because of their practice. I don't want to sound a bitter-possessive girlfriend here but he's just not fair and I hate him for that.

My phone rang at 11 30 AM as I was walking from the boarding house to the main gate, he said sorry and I said I understand ( I just don't want to talk to you) and I pressed the red key on my phone.

No, I never said the words enclosed in the parentheses but I am not sending him a message or calling him until now.


My realizations:
It's funny when people around us think that we do not have fights but the truth is, for the three years that we have been together, we fought a million times over pretty little things, and this one is no exception.


But then again, our fights serve as a therapy for us. It's the time for us to have bonding moments with ourselves, reflect about how we are behaving for the past days, and finally realize that we are still two different individuals bounded by the love that we have for each other.

He is my best-friend and my worst enemy, my number one fan and my greatest critic, and I would'nt want to be with any other guy for that matter.