So I am typing this post two days before Halloween. Weird. I don't know why for the many times I have tried to write a new entry to this inactive part of the blogosphere, it's just today that I finally hit the "New Post button"on my blog's dashboard. So I'd like to write about a lot of things but I don't really know where to start or how to start. Well, if you were brought here by accident, thank you. Haha.
So if you're reading my previous "I-was-cheated-on-by-my-boyfriend" posts, thank you for wasting your precious time reading my sentiments. LOL.
Yeah, after months of hiatus, I finally had the courage to open this account again, go through old blog posts about us, about school, my rants and raves, about the old me. I changed a lot, and there were times I felt like I want to step back, times when I just want to run away from all the pain, times when I could no longer bear the sight of seeing him again and realizing that "hey, I was the person you used to love, can't we get another chance?".....but those times were the very same times that I stayed where I am-although I felt my knees shaking, my heart throbbing and my eyes in tears, I stayed.
The whole experience brought out the person that has long been missed by her friends, the person who always laugh the loudest, the person who always crack corny jokes- the person I thought I had lost in trying to please someone- me.
I felt like I was a shattered glass-broken into pieces, fragile, weak.
Yet, there must be someone who would gather all the pieces and fix it again, or at the very least try to make something out of those broken pieces so that people would avoid getting wounded by the mess of the shattered glass.
And I have my wonderful, crazy and cool buddies, advisers and the best parents to thank for rebuilding my life, for always reminding me that there are better things in life, for pushing me to my limits, for saying to me that there's more to life than a four-year relationship with your first boyfriend..that for sure, it would hurt..but all the pain would be gone eventually..that it's about time I reflect on myself, to explore things beyond the world that I knew and to start anew.
Six months have passed. I don't know where I am going.. all I know is that my knees are strong enough to move forward, my eyes are clear enough to see the roads I must take and that I am ever ready to embrace each day as a gift from my Creator.
I know this is nonsense, so a huge thank you for taking time to read. Hehe.
Have a good day everyone!