Long Live!

Got up early today for an activity.

Soaked up in the sun like I used to 10 long years ago.

Met new friends and had fun, fun, fun!

Got myself to sweat like I never sweated before at the grasses of university oval.

Played basketball with my special someone even if it meant losing big time.

Felt like a child again-at least for this day.

Thank you for this wonderful day, my dear brothers and sisters. ;-)

You guys continuously inspire me to change for the better,
to always think about the people around before me,
to always strive to do good,
to enjoy life,
to laugh out loud,
to take one day at a time,
and to discover and do things I never thought I would.

Long Live Alpha Phi Epsilon.

Thank you for showing the real meaning of camaraderie, Alpha Sigmans/Sigma Alphans and Alpha Phi Omegans!

Ilang bagay na natutunan ko sa SUC III Olympics.

SUC III Olympics- State Universities and Colleges in Region III Olympics

Hindi, hindi ako atleta, coach o ano pa man na may kinalaman sa isports, pero isa ako sa mga mamamahayag na kabilang sa publikasyon para sa buong SUC III olympics.

Masaya sana dahil bakasyon engrande ng isang linggo, pero pinili kong tanggapin ang trabaho hindi dahil sa gusto ko lang magkaroon ng dahilan sa hindi ko pago-observe sa Field Study subject ko pero dahil "once in a lifetime" ang pagkakataong gaya nito.

Hindi ko na inisip ang tutulugan ko sa isang linggo o kung may kaibigan ba akong makakasama sa pagtili at pagpipigil sa emosyon ko sa tuwing natatalo ang CLSU sa mga laro. Sa halip, inisip ko na lang na ito ang GUSTO kong gawin. Ito ang kaya kong gawin at ito ang magagawa ko para sa pamantasan ko.

Bukod pa dito, nabalitaan ko kasi na makakasama namin sa pagtatravaho ang mga bigatin sa larangan ng pagsusulat sa aming pamantasan, bihira lamang na makaka-trabaho mo sila, kaya bakit naman ako tatanggi dito diba?

Likas akong inggitera, kaya tuwing may ganitong okasyon, naiinggit ako sa mga atleta na suot-suot ang makukulay at bagong-bagong mga "jersey", jacket at sapatos nila, naisip ko, bakit hindi ako kailan man nahilig sa isports?

Habang pinapanood ko silang maglakad mula main gate hanggang sa oval, naisip ko na naman: it couldn't get any bongga than this!". At tunay nga naman na bonggang bongga ang naging simula ng palaro dahil sa fireworks display noong gabi, tila bawat isa'y bumalik sa pagkabata at hindi napigilan ang sarili sa pagsasabi ng "HUWAW!" tuwing magsasabog ng liwanang ang mga paputok, at isa ako sa mga iyon!

Field reporter ako.

Naalala ko tuloy noong bagong salta ako sa CLSU Collegian, intramural games noon sa CLSU at sa opisina kami natulog para makaabot sa parada at makapag-cover ng opening program, pero sa huli, nauna din sa amin ang parada at sumunod kami sa banda habang suot namin ang t-shirt namin.

Swimming ang event na ci-nover ko noon, nagpaalam ako sa Educator (pahayagan namin sa kolehiyo) na sa Kule ako magsusulat, maswerte ako dahil pumayag naman sila. Mahirap maging field reported kung wala kang kakapalan ng mukha na kausapin at harapin ang pagalit ng mga game supervisors sa pangungulit mo sa kanila tuwing hihiramin mo ang records ng mga natapos na event-isang bagay na natutunan ko sa CLSU Collegian na hinding-hindi ko malilimutan.

Gusto ko sana na volleyball o basketball ang i-cover ko, para sa grandstand lang ako, nakaupo habang hinihintay na matapos ang mga laro at kausapin ang game supervisor, pero naunahan ako kaya football na lang kako, bukod sa wolleyball, basketball, badminton at taekwondo, isa ang football sa mga larong masarap panuorin at punong-puno ng emosyon na gustong gusto ko naman dahil ma-drama akong nilalang. Haha.

O siya, heto ang ilang bagay na hindi ko malilimutan ngayong SUC III olympics.

1.Kahit ilang taon kang manalo, kung nandadaya ka naman, mauubos ang RESPETO ng tao sa'yo!
(ehem!)

2. Malamang ay hihilingin ko na palaging may presswork lalo pa't walang maliw ang pagkain, kape at libreng wi-fi connection! Aba, masarap ata magtrabaho kapag ganun!

3. Bilang miymebro ng media, dapat ay hindi ka bias, pero minsan dahil sa kapipigil ng emosyon mo, bigla ka na lang mapapatili kapag naka-goal ang team ng eskwelahan niyo at mahihiya ka sa katabi mong mabait na game supervisor, at mula noon ay hindi mo na siya malapitan sa sobrang hiya!

4. Huwag na huwag makikipag-away sa iniirog mo dahil lang hindi kayo magkita o magkasama kahit nasa iisang lugar kayo, lalo pa kung atleta siya at maaga silang natalo sa laro kung ayaw mong magkaroon kayo ng giyera!

5. Kung inaakala mo na okay na okay na ang artikulong ipapasa mo sa mga editors mo, maling-mali ka dahil mahaba-habang pag-aayos pa pala ang dapat gawin.

6. Huwag kang magrereklamo sa lasa ng pagkain lalo pa't hindi ka naman nagbayad!

at higit sa lahat,

muli kaming nagka-sama-sama at nag-bonding ng mga dati kong ka-batak sa CLSU Collegian!
na-miss ko kayo, grabeh!

Siya, 'yan na muna.

Wag na wag kayong magbubulsa ng bato at buhangin ha!

Ag biag ti ASCOT, BASC, BPSU, CLSU, DHVTSU, PAC, PMMA, PhilSCA, NEUST, RMTU, TCA at TSU!

How you make me feel, Mr.

Oftentimes, my problem being in a student publication is that I am too emotional when I write. Once I was asked to write a column for our first issue, I made three major revisions to the column because it was either too emotional, too painful or too harsh until I finally decided to scrap it out and create a new one that will serve its purpose.

You cannot blame me. I really am emotional, worse, I tend to keep my emotions, shut up my mouth and wait until it explodes so I can let go of it one time, big time. But it took its toll on me a few months ago. I was bitten behind my back and the enemy knows my weakness. He played with me until I burst in front of a whole college- it was our Meeting de Avance.

I never knew I was releasing all my angst that time and it was not good. I could have just kept calm, shut up my mouth and presented what I am supposed to present- and yes, the enemy won, and I lost- almost everything, except my self.

It was hard for the first few months after the incident, but then again, words of encouragement from people who really know me came and I promised to redeem myself, I promised to prove the enemy wrong and I promised to continue being the person that I am.

I got up, little by little, I got my confidence back. I started smiling and it felt so good. It felt so good knowing that you do not have emotional burdens and knowing that you are living your life fully without hurting other people.

Now, it's all coming back to you.

I am not surprised by what has happened to you.

You got the power, you got everything that we have worked for a year, you got my reputation and self-esteem crushed, you hit me at my weakest, every shameless thing that you did worked for you, and yet you decided to put it into trash.

You just decided to put into trash the good name that your predecessors have worked in years of servant leadership, courage, unity and respect.

You just have put into trash the dreams and ideals of a thousand students hoping for the change that you promised them.

You just have put into trash a whole year of meaningful activities, projects and student camaraderie that should have been a very productive one.

You just have put into trash my belief in male leaders.

You just have put into trash my interest in politics, my belief that there are still politicians who will do good for this country.

And most of all,

you just have proven that what you said on why you would run for presidency is true:

"Gusto ko lang may maka-laban kayo.."

-Mr. Villanueva

You started it, now let me do the honor of finishing it.

Congratulations on your impeachment.

Real Teachers teach from the heart, not from their BIG egos.

I have often heard news about Education students in our university being the laughing stock of some Social Science professors from the College of Arts and Sciences. I don't know why they often judge, generalize and mock CEd students who are enrolled in CAS sections for minor subjects like Philosophy 100 and History 100 in their classes and then flunk them just because they are CEd students. And oh, I don't even think considering them as "professors", "teachers" or "instructors".

I see only one reason. Ego. Remember Beyonce's song?

He got a big ego, such a huge ego, such a huge ego

They simply can not accept that Educ students are in fact one of the brightest among the students in the university,that just because we took an Education course make us less intelligent than the ones who took up Veterinary Science and Medicine, Accountancy, Biology and Chemistry.

Ego as defined by Merriam-Webster Online dictionary as the self especially as contrasted with another self or the world."

Their egos are hurt because they may be bright, they may have graduated from the top universities in the country, but they cannot to anything to bring the Educ spirit down and they are doing everything they can to destroy Educ, but they simply cannot.

Why?

Modesty aside, it is a known fact in CLSU that Educ dominates a lot of University events, may it be sports, debate, literary. musical, arts, creativity, unity.... name it and Educ is definitely among the top three in every event and competition in the university.

When Educ wins, they say that we cheat, that there is bias, they blame it to the VPAA who is a former CEd dean, they blame it to OSA Personnels who are "incompetent" according to them. When their college wins, we just feel happy about it and strive to do better next time.

And I believe that's the Educ difference that our college has imbued on us, that no matter how tough life can be, we can always prove that we are tougher, that there is no one who can tell us to stop reaching our dreams but ourselves.

Our professors epitomizes what they teach. They live by the principle that "you cannot give what you do not have". So when students pass, it is because they have given what they have. Consequently, failing a whole class as what these Social Science "instructors" do with Educ students reflects that they cannot give us anything except for curses, stories about alcohol, cigarettes and curses, curses and nasty remarks. One even said that he trained to be a priest, but didn't pursue it. Good thing though, because there is no way he can be a priest with his attitude of cursing and labeling students.

I believe that real teachers teach from the heart, not from the thick books, not from their huge egos-thinking that they know everything.

That what will matter is where you are heading after college, and I know most of their students teaching in public schools- and they curse teachers?

Apparently, as "instructors", they are also cursing themselves, right?

I just hope and pray that they can sleep well at night, and that their kids won'r experience what my college-mates experienced with them.

Go Mighty Educ!

twists and turns

It's been a while since I've updated my blog, school's really eating my time, my emotions and everything else.

Last week seemed to be the longest and agonizing week in school since college.

Emotions bursted, tears fell and feelings were hurt.

A melodramatic twist in the smooth-sailing adventure called college.

Election is really, really tough. At the very last moment, our standard bearer backed-out and malicious leaflets against the Student Council spread like wildfire, avery good political tactic, right?

I overreacted and thought the Meeting de Avance is a chance so I could justify our actions and hopefully make the students aware that every peso that they have paid have gone a good, long way and not like what the other party is claiming.

I was so confident that I forgot that my voice was actually shaking and as a defense, I tried to louden my voice. Then all of a sudden, I felt really, really weak. I want to give up, go down that stage and let everything just pass me by. But looking to the eyes of our dear advisers, I decided to go on and tell the truth to the students, but they seemed to be too deaf to hear and too cynic to believe.

And lo and behold, I lost the elections the next day and it was game-over.

I was hurt but I didn't cry because I lost. Losing is inevitable and I tried to absorb the fact that when a door closes, a window will open and that there is nothing to cry about because what we have done to the college is incomparable and invaluable, maybe it has just to end there.

That afternoon, I was in my usual mood when Ma'am Jen, our prof. in Assessment II asked if I won, I shook my head and she asked why. I honestly don't know Ma'am, I replied. And then, she said her piece. "Alam niyo class, I really admire these students. Kasi kung titingnan niyo yung mga dating SC, talagang nakita ko na may nagawa sila sa college, lalo na sa inyo, nung enrolment nyo, isang linggo silang nakaupo, nagre-resibo kahit pa sabihin niyo na pinapa-meryenda sila eh wala namang sinusweldo mula sa college yang mga 'yan.

Service lang talaga.

At in fairness to them, madami silang nagawag pagbabago. Siguro iisipin niyo hindi ko dapat sinasabi ito kasi faculty ako pero nariinig ko kasi yung mga pangyayari noong Meeting de Avance, hindi talaga naging tama kasi kung naghahanap kayo ng perpektong lider, wala nun eh.

Kung tayo nga hindi perpekto, sila pa kaya?
At oo, may lapses sila, pero hindi maiiwasan 'yun kaya wala tayong karapatan na magsabi ng hindi magagandang salita sa kanila lalo na kung wala kang nagawang maganda at mabuti sa college.

At kung may nakita kang mali, dapat sana ginawan mo ng paraan sa sarili mo para maitama ito at hindi mo lang isisisi sa mga nakaupo lahat ng nangyayari.

Ang problema kasi sa atin, we fail to appreciate the good things, pero kapag hindi na maganda ang mga nangayayari, doon natin nakikita yung mga pagkakamali.

Kaya nga kung wala kang naitulong na maganda sa college at wala kang alam sa mga nangyayari, wag ka na lang magsalita."

Tears fell unconsciously and I was crying really hard for the very touching and comforting words from someone whom I would just casually greet "Good Morning" whenever I see her walking to her office.

And more than any pain that time, I cried because of happiness.
I cried because someone who I never imagined would say those very words actually did, and it just means so much to me, more than losing.

We filed a protest that day, and exchange of words between the electoral board chairman which happens to be my senior in Educator went really far. Our dean called both parties today to settle issues and what seems to be a clash between the two parties ended with tears, forgiveness and love.

Going through all these is not easy.
Friendships were tainted.
Relationships were broken.
Emotions flared.

Through it all, I have known myself better, I have loved myself a little bit more, I have known who my real friends are and I have known how to forgive and say sorry to the people that I have hurt. It is about time to rebuild the broken friendships, to mend broken relationships and forget the emotions for the benefit of a thousand more.

And just like what my advisers have told me, "Siguro hindi lang sa SC makakapag-lingkod. Malay niyo, maging mayor kayo. At alam naman natin yung totoo diba. Naging magandang training din ang SC sa inyo, sana madami kayong natutunan sa mga nangyari, basta lagi nitong tatandaan mga anak, nandito lang kami para suportahan kayo sa lahat. "

Iisipin ko na lang maganda ako. :)

Prologue: AY 2009-2010

Supposedly, this year is my last year in school. Supposedly.

Flashback two years ago: Our section was composed of 50 college kids dreaming to be educators in a country where the educational system is questioned.

We all have our ideals. We firmly stand in what we believe that we can somehow effect change in the system. Our responses to our professors' question on why we chose an Education course is very simple: "We love children. We love influencing other people. We want to mold the young so they can be effective members of the society."

Years passed and the original 50 dreamers were trimmed to 40. What happened? Some shift courses, while most find jobs to sustain their education, but was not able to find time to study. And on the summer of that year, a friend returned home to the Big Guy Up There a day after her 18th birthday.

Junior year came.

We all came to realize that we cannot simply change the system, we realized that being a teacher is not that easy. Lesson planning sessions challenged our determination and patience and made us doubt if we really want to pursue what we have started. But then again, we were able to push through and had our first taste of demonstration teaching.

Senior year.
What will happen next?
We'll see.

AY 2009-2010, here we come! :)

What happened in 1st day?
1. I lost the presidency of the class for some reasons I still don't want to mention. :)
2. The terror Filipino professor is now baack!
3. The student council had our first meeting.
4. I didn't LIKE some of our instructors.

Summer 09: FINALE

Summer classes officially ended!

Yay for the end of nerve-wracking, mind-tickling Philosophy classes and getting to know you sessions with Thales, Anaximenes, Karl Marx, Aristotle, Descartes and Heidegger.

Yay for the end of seemingly unending class reports, film analysis, and critiquing sessions.

Admission slip is coming in 3 days. Courage alert. :)

differences

I was browsing through my Friends' list at my Friendster account when I saw a former CLSUan whom I've sent a friend request before because he ranked 1st in the CLSU-Admission Test.

As I was looking at his profile, I found out that he has transferred to a private school in Manila.

Like so many stories that unfolded before me, his is not different.

I once thought of transferring to SLU to take up what I really wanted, Mass Communication or at WU-P and join the Nursing phenomena, or stay in the university that I have adored and respected since high school.

I opted to choose the latter.

Then I asked myself why.

For two semesters, I underwent through the dilemma of what path should I take and what dream should I pursue.
It was real-hard having to choose from what is there to see and experience in a university where I know a few people and the ability to live a comfortable life in a place where you have your friends or your sister.

But in the end, I stayed in my university and tried to make my stay worth it, and I can say that I have no regrets.

Now, whenever I hear CLSUans who are my former school-mates in high school having plans of transferring to another school, "hindi nila kinaya", I would say to myself.

Living in a university located in the far-north of Nueva Ecija isn't really easy for students who came from the southern part of the province, you have to deal with the Ilocanos who speak their native language as if they are talking about you and you cannot understand a thing because you only speak and understand Tagalog and that is the first time you hear the Iloko language in your entire existence.

Secondly, the real CLSU life happens in the dormitories and cottages where I have learned countless ways to eat without spending even a centavo, having a yummy dinner with just 20 pesos and picking that mango fruit smiling at you even if it is prohibited.

Then, there are the dorm residents who would scare you that you cannot live in a dormitory because you are too lazy to get up early in the morning and clean the assigned area for your room.

These are my frustrations before, I felt that I don't belong to the Iloko-speaking peeps, but then, I have learned to adopt to it over-time, trying to learn the language and asking my friends to teach me and interpret the joke our professor just said.

Differences are indeed inevitable.

I am just lucky that I was able to adopt to the transition between the world that I knew in high school and a much bigger world waiting to be explored in college.

And though I have doubted my decision and my ability to learn new things, I have no regrets for the dilemma that I went through, because it have made me realized that I could do things more that what I thought I could.

I just hope that students who have plans of transferring to another university especially my school-mates in high school, would bring with them a bunch of good memories and lessons learned in their short stay in the university.

The Filipino Stereo-type

"Mama, hindi ako ga-graduate sa isang taon."

I told my Mom during our dinner.
Of course, like every parent, she asked why.
I simply told her I will not be able to enroll Off-Campus Student Teaching by the second semester because I have to enroll all the subjects required for me to go practice teaching.

"MADALI LANG NAMAN ANG EDUC AH!"

It's confusing hearing those words from people who think that Education is an easy course. Of course it was, but things are a lot different now.
While most third year students only have 20 units per sem, we have 28 units, full load, and if you're trying to make-up for your back subjects, I wish you Good luck.
It is not easy to be a teacher.

While many people label most Education students as "bobo" and while most old folks think that Education is for students and parents who cannot afford a Nursing course, I want to have a good debate with them because I firmly believe that the stigma that the society has posted upon Education students is not true anymore. Maybe it was before, change is inevitable, right? Besides, I know many Education students who can afford a Nursing course even in good schools, but still pursued what their hearts and minds really desired and tried not to join in the Philippines' national course phenomena by enrolling a Nursing course.

The CHED memorandum circular directs all Teacher-Education institutions to provide a curriculum for Elementary Education that will cover all the subjects in the elementary level, thus adding another year for the Education course, simply put, we will be majoring in ALL the subjects, and it's not easy like those found in elementary textbooks.

In a state university who can barely provide means and ways for its finances, the subjects are compacted to 28 units per sem and 9 units every summer.

Again, I am wishing the students who have back subjects good luck with the Calculus, Taxation, Economics, Physics, Astronomy and Chemistry.

Now, are those subjects taught in elementary?

Who can say that it is THAT EASY?